“What You Don’t See” – A Parent Who Carries More Than You Know
Content Note: Ableism
You see a parent
Who fills out forms late
Who forgets the water bottle
Or doesn’t respond to your emails until Thursday.
What you don’t see:
That I’m holding a whole history in my hands—
Of systems that ignored me and let me fall.
You don’t see the time I was 10
And sat alone at recess
Because no one explained to the other kids
Why I acted different, played different.
You don’t see the high school teacher
Who said, “In the real world, you don’t get to work alone,”
When I asked for a quiet place to write exams.
You don’t see the boss
Who told me I didn’t “dress like a lesbian.”
You don’t see the ways I started to believe that I was
Annoying.
Not right.
Not enough.
And now,
I have a child
Who moves through the world
Like I once did.
And I am doing everything in my power
To keep them from absorbing that same story.
So when I ask for a lot of information,
Or send too many emails,
Or seem nervous at drop-off—
Please know
I’m not trying to be difficult.
I’m trying to rewire history.
I’m trying to shield my child
From the slow, quiet erosion
Of self-worth
That comes from being constantly misunderstood.